One day the Russian started a quest to dig the earth and see
what they have....
they dig until 100m and found some copper wire.... and make a statement
"Our ppl has been using telephone for communication since 200 yrs ago"

When the American see this.. they start digging too...
around it went deep until 500m...
and found some fiber optic look a like and claim that
"Our people has been using fiber optic for communication for 500yrs ago"

Looking at both claims... the Malaysian started to dig too.... 100m...
500m.... and 800m...
they found NOTHING ! You know what they claim?
"We are already using wireless communication 1000yrs ago"

2 Hunters

2 hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator:
"My friend is dead! What can I do?"
The operator, in a calm soothing voice says: "Just take it easy. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead."
There is a silence, then a shot is heard. The guy's voice comes back on the line. He says: "OK, now what?"

Would you please move your cars?

It had been snowing for hours when an announcement came over the intercom: "Will the students who are parked on University Drive please move their cars so that we may being plowing."

Twenty minutes later there was another announcement: "Will the nine hundred students who went to move fourteen cars return to class."

Sandy began a job as an elementary school counselor and she was eager to help. One day during recess she noticed a girl standing by herself on one side of a playing field while the rest of the kids enjoyed a game of soccer at the other.

Sandy approached and asked if she was all right.

The girl said she was.

A little while later, however, Sandy noticed the girl was in the same spot, still by herself.

Approaching again, Sandy offered, "Would you like me to be your friend?"

The girl hesitated, then said, "Okay," looking at the woman suspiciously.

Feeling she was making progress, Sandy then asked, "Why are you standing here all alone?"

"Because," the little girl said with great exasperation, "I'm the goalie!"

HUNGRY?

Come here for review of good food around singapore.

VISIT:Hungrycomehere.blogspot.com

Short version
Diner: I can't eat this chicken. Call the manager.
Waiter: It's no use. He can't eat it either.

Long version
Diner: Waiter, look at this chicken, nothing but skin and bones.
Waiter: What else do u want, feathers?
Diner: I can't eat this chicken. Call the manager!
Waiter: It's no use. He won't eat it either.
Diner: You'll drive me to my grave!
Waiter: Well, you don't expect to walk there, do you?

Diner: Do you serve chicken here?

Waiter: Sit down, Sir. We serve anyone.

"Fei Hua"

A linguistics professor was lecturing to his English class one day. "In English," he said, "A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative."

A voice from the back of the room piped up, "Yeah, right."